POEM/MARANAM

QUICK TO THE POINT Vs MY PLACE AND PLEASURE (QTP Vs MPP)

In the this overloaded digital and information flow era there is bizarre problem faced in the meeting, seminars, workshops or by almost every trainers and teachers. It can classified as QTP or MPP(Quick to the point or I will go to my place and pleasure)The problem we are facing is people cannot concentrate any point of discussion or training delivery if immediately moderator come to the point or keep the interest alive and conclude it in logical way he or she can understand easily.Otherwise people will quickly go to their place of pleasure ,most possibly a smart phone or tablet which is readily available with them all the time. In fact people cannot resist the urge to be in touch with rest of the world, or share and receive information from others who are on the same gadgets in an unseen location. Obviously it prevent them to concentrate in any point of discussion or matter relevant to their productive life and job but not having same rate or interest.
All moderators, teachers and trainers should make their classes, speeches, deliveries are up to the point, clear, precise, and stronger communicative than this attention diverting gadgets. If they are not succeed in this attempt of QTP simply the audience or team will go back to MPP.
This is not a problem it is a persistence an challenge we all to face in somewhere in daily life weather it home, office, training room or board room.

DUSK OF DECEMBER

KANAMARAYATHU

ABSENTEEISM VS PRESENTEEISM

In HSE management process absenteeism subsequent to any injury and ill health treated as primary loss and given all thrust to control it. However one new scenario formed in the era of this digitalised, over informed and immobilised office set up. This can considered as presenteeism. It is just opposite of absenteeism where a worker is off from office after any kind of injury. Where as in this scenario employee will be physically present in the office for work but he will not deliver the desired quality and quantity of his assigned work. He is not an under performer, but because of his/her poor wellness, weak attention, burden of personal and official information inflow and out flow, he/she will not deliver what expecting form normal employee.
Personally available in office but individuals wellness not health , mental condition including feelings, emotions and psychological alertness may not fit for performing his day to day work, or person is virtually absent even though physically available in office and engage in his normal work. When it read with the electronically connected individual’s real presence ,peer pressure from society, over burdened by the electronically transmitting communications in every second, he/she is missing his golden hours, basic required attention level required for work(eg.first 2 hours after reaching office, getting electronic message while on urgent meeting).Finally individual is not deliberately engaged anything but forced by coming messages other than official, or unable to concentrate on work after the attention diverting communication reaching without out his deliberate invitation or wish.
Absenteeism scenario is very easy to handle, measure and control, however presenteeism cannot be tackle easily. The main reason is it cannot accurately measurable or immediately understandable. Superiors and colleagues cannot assess the presenteeism problem of an employee, hence failed to take any counter measures. This included his well being, physical and mental fitness to engage his given task and deliver within the targeted time and volume.
Emotional connections and very weak in this era of electronic closeness, and capacity of an employee’s delivery range or skills and actual delivery is seldom evaluated other than given target and time line. Hence unfortunately presenteeism is not considered as a symptom urgently needs detection and correction.

For a peaceful life

1. Do Not Interfere In Others' Business Unless Asked.
Most of us create our own problems by interfering too often in others'affairs. We do so because somehow we have convinced ourselves that our way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic and those who do not conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to the right direction, our direction. No two human beings can think or act inexactly the same way. Mind your own business and you will keep your peace.

2. Forgive And Forget.
This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind. We often develop ill feelings inside our heart for the person who insults us or harms us. We nurture grievances. This in turn results in loss of sleep, development of stomach ulcers, and high blood pressure. This insult or injury was done once, but nourishing of grievance goes on forever by constantly remembering it. Get over this bad habit. Life is too short to waste on such trifles. Forgive, forget, and march on. Love flourishes with giving and forgiving.

3. Do Not Crave Recognition.
This world is full of selfish people. They seldom praise anybody without selfish motives. They may praise you today because you are in power, but no sooner than you are powerless, they will forget your achievement and will start finding faults in you. Their recognition is not worth the aggravation. Do your duties ethically and sincerely.

4. Do Not succumb to envy and jealousy.
We all have experienced how envy can disturb our peace of mind. You know that you work harder than your colleagues in the office, but sometimes they get promotions; you do not. You started a business several years ago, but you are not as successful as your neighbor whose business is only one year old. There are several examples like these in everyday life. Should you envy?
No. Remember everybody's life is shaped by his/her destiny, which has now become his/her reality. Nothing will be gained by blaming others for your misfortune. Jealousy will not get you anywhere, it will only take away your peace of mind.

5. Change Yourself According To The Environment.
If you try to change the environment single-handedly, chances are you will fail. Instead, change yourself to suit your environment. As you do this, even the environment, which has been unfriendly to you, will mysteriously change and seem more congenial and harmonious with your goals.

6. Endure What Cannot Be Cured.
This is the best way to turn a disadvantage into an advantage. Every day we face numerous inconveniences, ailments, irritations, and accidents that are beyond our control. If we cannot control them or change them, we must learn to put up with these things. We must learn to endure them cheerfully. Believe in yourself and you will gain in terms of patience, inner strength and will power.

7. Do Not Bite Off More Than You Can Chew.
This maxim needs to be remembered constantly. We often tend to take more responsibilities than we are capable of carrying out. This is done to satisfy our ego. Know your limitations. Why take on additional loads that may create more worries? You cannot gain peace of mind by expanding your external activities. Reduce your material engagements and spend time in prayer, introspection and meditation. This will reduce those thoughts in your mind that make you restless. An uncluttered mind will produce greater feelings of peace.

8. Meditate Regularly.
Meditation calms the mind and gets rid of disturbing thoughts. This is the highest state of peace of mind. Try and experience it yourself. If you meditate earnestly for half an hour everyday, your mind will tend to become peaceful during the remaining twenty three and a half hours. Your mind will not be as easily disturbed as it was before. You would benefit by gradually increasing the period of daily meditation. You may think that this will interfere with your daily work. On the contrary, this will increase your efficiency and you will be able to produce better results in less time.

9. Never Leave The Mind Vacant.
An empty mind is the devil's workshop. All evil actions start in the vacant mind. Keep your mind occupied in something positive, something worthwhile. Actively follow a hobby. Do something that holds your interest. You must decide what you value more: money or peace of mind. Your hobby, like social work or charity work, may not always earn you more money, but you will have a sense of fulfillment and achievement.

10. Do Not Procrastinate And Never Regret.
Do not waste time in protracted wondering Should I or shouldn't I? Days, weeks, months, and years may be wasted in that futile mental debating. You can never plan enough because you can never anticipate all future happenings. Value your time and do the things that need to be done. It does not matter if you fail the first time. You can learn from your mistakes and succeed the next time. Sitting back and worrying will lead to nothing. Learn from your mistakes, but do not brood over the past.

DO NOT REGRET. Whatever happened was destined to happen only that way. Why cry over spilled milk?

Who is good manager

A good managr is the leader who make the things done by his team without inforcement with enpowerment.

Who will be the change

we have to learn lessons from our experience to make necessary correction in the further journey ahead.
We can be part of change or we will be the change,being part of change is an involuntary action that we going through, but become change by ourself need right thinking, right action at right time, an outlook and mindset to scrifice and share.

Maravi..(POEM)

For my daughter...

For my Daughter 

Write your name in bright
Fight  your war always straight
Make your feelings without shy
Take your dreams up to the sky.

Speak with the words of nice
Share the mind with wise
Care the world of your proud
Spare your life from the crowd.

Poem

SELF ESTEEM AND SELF CONFIDENCE -THE KEYS OF SUCCESS.

A self confident personality is not possible until we built solid foundation of self reliance, the main deterrence of self reliance is mistaken beliefs that others are smarter, wiser, more intelligence or luckier than we are.

This causes us to look others for your happiness and welfare. The moment you are comparing yourself with anyone else you are subjecting psychological slavery. And we are always find external reasons for all of our worriers.

Please remember that we have born with only two fears- fear of loud noise and fear of falling down- rest of the fear about anything- your promotion, what society will think about your family, or what your boss impression about your work, or what wife‘s mood if you have late in friends party with two pegs, all these we have created because of our false self confidence.

No one can let you down if you are not leaning to them. No one can hurt your feelings; make you unhappy, angry or disappointed if you are depend on them for your welfare, inspiration and motivation.

Once you are self confident you don’t have to procrastinate, escape or evade what we facing in our life

Can we examine what is the reason for this domination of third parties in our life?

Every living being in the world has two options when they are facing with any kind of problem or threat- FIGHT OR FLIGHT

Fight- means you have to stay there and conquer/eliminate the reason of your fear   

Flight – means you must run away from your problem, so that you feel safe.

Our all body reactions, like sweating, increased heartbeat, adrenaline hormone pumping in to blood etc is to make us ready for fight or flight action.

Human being, since having an intelligent animal should take an appropriate action after analysing the situation – please remember that the same thing is applicable to all- but with less or nil intelligence.

In depth examination shows that we are spending our entire childhood to developing skills that would make good impression on others.

Thus even at the early point of our life we were programming ourselves to depend other peoples approval. If we are doing good things not because we would like to do it but because others believe it is good and appreciates the work.

We will get comment and approval as good kids. This will make us approval and recognition seekers rather self confident individuals 

Shortly after birth all other species of animals push their young out in to the rough and real world where they soon learn independence and self reliability.

The greatest gift parents can give their children is to help them self confident by making them self reliant. Remember that we cannot live other people’s lives or bear their burden no matter how much we love them.

Obligation is the greatest psychological evil of mankind, we wanted to be great person, be independent and do important things but he cannot, because our primary motivation is always seeking approval of others.

How we can achieve the great happiness and way of self confidence if we will adopt the following five things.

1.     Never compare yourself with anybody else- Comparison is sign of poor self esteem and condition of fear. If you are working in large company with this comparison syndrome you always be in fear that the people above are superior to you and below are threat for catching up your position and ultimately loses the enjoyment of life and job.

2.     Avoid unnecessary competition- Unhealthy completion kills creativity. Really we are starting competent with others when we are unsure about our own abilities. We strive to excellence in our own life rather be competitor to others and approval seekers.

3.     Seek reorganisation not praise. If you are praise seeker every time you do something to meet someone else’s expectation not prove your capacity or skills. Participation is a great achievement-do remember that.

4.     Free yourself from other expectations and do what you are thinking right.  Your basic responsibility is your own physical and emotional well being. Nothing can stop you from achieving total self confidence if you really wanted to. Question is bondage or liberty, the choice is up to you. 

5.     Accept and encourage your self esteem. You can never be better than your self esteem. Boost your self esteem by every deed and never accept anything which lay down your esteem. Self esteem is nothing but accept your worth and skills and value addition to the life.

a.     Self esteem is not ego trip, if you are egoistic you will become a boasting guy and it shows poor self esteem.

b.     Self esteem is not making you happy; accept and adopt high values and beliefs which will make others too happy in your life. In surface many people including great personalities  appear to have high self esteem, but not always , some of the most admired people in the history have become drug addict, alcoholic and even committed suicide just to escape]e from poor self esteem.

Friends, and fellow toast masters, no one is obligated to change just to make your life better and comfortable, because every one of us is doing our best in the preset level of awareness.

Aware, Achieve and Adjust

Really nobody, No corporate gurus like Robin Sharma or books can motivate a person, what they are doing is changing a persons awareness once your awareness changes, you must change completely. Changing awareness means get knowledge.

Achieve something you believe worthy in your life, it may be laptop or charitable donation, or daily prayer or admission of a club, which will boost your self esteem in high level.

If you are perfectionist, you always find problems, so learn to adjust this word is here like this because of many people working for us, hence we also work for somebody else with our contribution.

When you are using your skills and talents in profession to improve the quality of life we are learning to share and care. And Adjust with others.

 If you adopted the following few steps will make magical changes in your life.

1. Remove/leave anything in our life that is not working well for our life- Leave all self defeating concepts and believes.

2. Add and adopt good things which will boost your self esteem and self confidence-Keep Positive thoughts  

3. Avoid people, habit and moments that leading to poor self esteem- Avoid Negativism

4. Recognise our weakness and try deliberately to improve your strengths above the weakness.-Decide and determined that you need self confidence.

5. Take a strong decision and pledge that let nobody down your self esteem in any way. Up keep your self esteem.

We should live our self esteemed life in a confidence way with dignity, happiness, prosperity. The magic  keys we must use for opening the locks of mind and make it out.

Safe homes are sweet homes

East or west safe home is the best.

We are professionals in life and utilising our skills and talents for enhancing the quality of life and services of people. But how many of us using a small area of our attention and expertise in our home to make the sweet home as safe home? Of course none of us is doing it including me.

If we would adopt essential safety precautions and behaviour  in our home , it will be a  home really sweet  filled with everlasting happy and never any unpleasant incident  daring to enter.

Examine what are the areas we must give attention in our home

• Safety  &
• Security 

Safety must be the first priority because it will create irrecoverable loss once breached and further meet with an error.

Safety also can be sub dived in to:

1. Fire safety
2. Kids’ safety
3. Electrical safety
4. Equipments safety & building safety

1. Fire safety is closely related to kitchen hence let us examine the safety tips in kitchen first.  

• Always keep one fire extinguisher in kitchen.
• Never leave knives or any sharp objects open or accidently fall or touch.
• Inspect or let expert people inspect your gas pipe and oven in every six month
• Install smoke alarms in kitchen if possible.
• Never keep any poisonous material and insecticide in the kitchen.
• Never allow your cute kids inside the kitchen while cooking.
• Make sure that the cords of appliances are not hung over cooking range
• Leave space at the back of refrigerator for proper ventilation.
• Never consider any equipment you are using is 100 safe
• Never smoke inside the home, never  in bedroom

2. Kid’s safety Consider the age of your children and plan you home accordingly. Your home should change with your kids

• Put matchbox and lighters in locked cabinet
• Never leave child in bathtub and swimming pool alone.
• Keep all chemicals and medicines away from the Children’s reach. 
• Don’t place furniture near window in kid’s room.
• Keep heavy, small and breakable things away from children’s reach.
• bookshelves and other furniture should be firmly secured with wall brackets to prevent tipping
•  Never place sharp edges furniture as it can be harmful to kids. Always place round edges furniture

3. Electrical safety: Electricity is a good servant and bad master. And it is the number one cause of 80% fires 

• Never put extension cords under carpet or rugs as it causes short- circuit
• Keep curtains, clothes, paper stuff three feet away from light fitting  to avoid fire.
• Remember Electricity is not burn but it will make everything burn when uncontrolled or short circuited

4. Equipment’s safety & Building safety: All equipments made for working under some standard conditions not your will and wish

• Never place sharp edges furniture in bedroom. Always place round edges furniture. 
• If you or anybody else is placing pesticide or chemical near the AC outdoor unit it will become a hazard when you AC is on.
• Avoid Overload: Check for overloaded extension cords – usage should not exceed the recommended wattage.
• Make it Childproof: Areas  and equipments of particular danger include outlets, appliances, electronics and machineries keep away from children dn while working take necessary precaution about kids
• Cover Outlets: Cover all unused electrical outlets to prevent children from sticking a finger in the socket.
• Plan Your Escape: Practice a fire escape plan with your family where you identify two exits for every room and what to do with young children.
• Give special attention to special equipments like air heater,   pedestrian fan, vacuum cleaner this things will become monster when malfunction.

• Create an emergency plan:  Keep emergency numbers and contacts readily available by the phone.
• Unplug Appliances: Unplug appliances and electronics when not in use and store them out of your walkway.
• Cool Your heater: Set your water heater below 120 degrees Fahrenheit to avoid potential burns and to save energy.

No home will be safe home until and unless we take a deliberate attempt to make it safe. Please remember all homes are heaven for us but we adding the safety to home it will become real haven for our loved ones.

  A house is made of walls and beams; a home is built with care and dreams.”

Share the joy shred the sorrow

How many of us can remember who won the Oscar award for the best actor in this year or who was the best player in the world cup football.

Probability we couldn’t, but if ask the question about three decade back, you will answer without  any thought- that is what was the name  your best friend in primary class.

Reason- friendship is from heart and all other knowledge is stored your brain!

We all would like to have friends, but nobody know how we can get and keep a real friend

Today we will speak about friendship –the great flag ship of every human beings life.

Making someone friend is easy but keeping a friend for ever is a tough task, is there any techniques for getting nice friends.

There are few great secret for keeping friends for always and being a good friend

1. Think before Speak

Think before we speak, and be empathetic and sensitive about friends. If you are unsure what to say, think of something to say and then imagine how you would feel if your friend said that to you.

Respect other people’s opinion, religion, and customs. Even if we disagree with them but we can respect different viewpoints.

2. Listen more.

Good listeners are best friends of all, because everybody wants someone who listens then patiently and carefully. Listen without constantly thinking about how we are going to respond. We don’t want to think about our reply so much that we lose focus on what the other person is saying.

3. Touch and feel

Make your friends close to your hear by touching them. Shake hand, gestures with your hands patting in the shoulders, hugging all these actions are help to flow the current of love and care from you to your friend.

4. Share the happy

Don’t hesitate to share your happy with others, whatever it may be. Don’t waste any single moment to be happy. We cannot get rid of all our problems and them become happy, hence find out small spark of pleasure and enjoy it.

5. Shred the sorrow.

There is story of Lord Buddha that no one in the world being without a sorrow.

All human being having some sort of pain in their heart, but by sharing it with friend of compassion, and sympathy we can shred it and relieve from the pain. Just do it in friend ship.

6. Spend time with (for) friends

We need to make time to nurture the friendship if we want it to continue. A simple message at the right time, call over the mobile on the anniversary or birthday will create in depth impact to your friend and such relations will become solid like hard rocks.

7. Be honest in our actions

Years need to create a friend ship and only single moment needs to destroy it. Built the trust with your pals that is the corner stone of the relation.

8. Perfection is word you never find.

Don’t try to get a perfect friend or being perfect to others, be natural with all out our strengths and weakness

“Being happy doesn’t mean everything is perfect. It means you have decided to look beyond the imperfections.”  

9. Be positive in criticism

Find something positive in everybody and say things positively. Discouraging words are always hurt somebody. Say “you may look good in blue pants” instead “you will look like a buffoon in this dress”

10. Body language will speak the truth

You can easily mind your words and actions but you cannot hide your body language which will give the real state of your mind to others. Therefore know your body language, control your tone, and pitch of voice when communicating with friends. Keeping eye contact and fail posters will create pleasing mood in both.

Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.”

Add five days to your life, not two holidays in the weekend.

Have you ever heard statement that Sachin Tendulkar tired of cricket and and Latha Mangeshkar want a break from her job of singing, or Beckam would like to take holiday from foot ball boots.

Probably never we had such requests about their job. But all of us, the working people and professionals always complaining about tiresome work, tedious job and need of break.

What is the reason? When psychologist Ms. Vera Johns steiner interviewed one hundred creative people who are great success in their career- she found one thing in common: the passion of their work.

Simple truth is that we are doing our job for daily bread and loving to do something else as hobbies and habits. And we need a break from job because we cannot enjoy it.

As Mark Twain truly said “Whatever we are instructed to do is your work and whatever you are passionate to do is your hobby”

If we can enjoy our job as our enthusiastic hobby, what would be the result .we never stop working  or want break from the job  hence we are enjoying every moment like when Beckam playing foot ball or Sachin batting in cricket or a singer enjoying the song during the stage performance .

It is great idea but how enjoy a job which never would like embrace.

Only a few lucky people have their hobby as job or making the job like as pleasure as hobby easy hard task. We obviously are selecting a profession which will give us financial comfort and life security rather than our obsession.

But we can change it- simply Fake it till you make it.

You make a strong belief that what you are doing is the work really you are loving. Over period of time it will become true.

That is what the famous thinker  Confucius said: Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life. 

If our job has the zeal of course our life has the zest. And there are some other tips to make your work as your passion:

Use this 3 Ps and 3 Rs

Prepare, Practice and Participate & Relax, Recreate and Renovate  

Do necessary preparation for your job: Time management, work arrangement creating the team etc are essential to make your job easy and enjoyable.

Practice your job well. Achieve enough and required knowledge you needs in your work. Make good practices as part of your job - reach in office and meeting swell in time, honour other time too, deliver the promise, and divide big tasks in small and achievable pieces.

Participate in the job with fullest of your capacity, it will create lot of passion and success. And every success will boost your enthusiasm to do the job, and finally you will reach in the No Point of return where your job and passion become same. Then there is no special no secret for your success full career.

Now come to the other of the coin, if you are not detaching you from the work and you will not have the vigour and vitality to perform again.

Relax: Learn to handle stress, When you have a lot of stress about completing the target and meeting deadlines, you must do something to relax your mind, close your eyes and think that it's only a job and nothing much. And try to complete your target much more confidently without stress.
Recreations are Re-creation of your energy and enthusiasms of work. It is like re filling your car for another long journey.  To have fun at your job, feel fresh and energetic. The feeling of doing the best will charge you up.

Renovate: Do the things which will give enthusiasm and excitement on the work floor. Enjoy partying, celebrations, competitions.
Thomas Alwa Edition a man recorded 1093 patents in his life time had this to say about his brilliant career at the end of the life “I never did a day’s work in my life; it was all fun”

Find a job you like or like the job which you find then only we can add five days in our life instead of two holidays at the weekend.